Struggles
O.K. So, I officially hate the holidays. Or any day of celebration in my life. Why? Because all celebrations in the United States and probably anywhere else in the world are centered around food.
Thanksgiving was a total calorie disaster for me, and well, maybe it’s ok that it was because I had planned for it to be a cheat day. I wanted it to be a traditional food day for Matt and my brother and so I made all the bad stuff. Chicken Feed, aka Chex Mix, at a unhealthy, fat laden 171 calories per 1/2 cup. I guess not too bad if I could have stuck to just one serving, but, we all know I didn’t because I love the stuff.
Matt’s family introduced me to the evils of Mini Pecan Pie Tarts, or Pecan Tassies as they are known in the cookbook. These two bite evil bits of heaven are 120 calories each and I ate at least 9.
The rest of the evils were the usual butter rubbed turkey, mashed potatoes made with a whole stick of butter and real cream, green bean casserole, stuffing, candied yams and of course, pumpkin pie with Cool Whip. Needless to say, my body wasn’t happy about all the fat and salt and I felt nauseous when I went to bed that night.
The next day I weighed in and had, of course, gained a pound. So, I vowed to leave the leftovers alone and was a diet and exercise angel and when I weighed in on Monday, I had lost an impressive 6.4 lbs.
So, I continued with my angelic state because my birthday was on Wednesday and knew I would be going out and drinking and eating “bad” stuff.
On Wednesday, I strolled into weigh in knowing that I would be down more since I had behaved, and, after all, it was my freakin’ birthday so the weight loss gods have got to be good to me, right?
WRONG. Gain of 1.8. I cried in the car and forced myself to drive to the gym. I skipped my usual weight lifting routine and just focused on getting in 90 minutes of cardio. But, I was down all day. On my birthday.
Matt took me to Estes Park to celebrate my birthday and of course we went out to eat. I consumed way too many calories in alcohol and food. Still, I hoped that the next day we could hike in beautiful Rocky Mountain National Park and i could erase some of my sinning.
But, the weight loss gods were not smiling upon me. The temperatures were freezing, the snow was flying and the wind was blowing.
I came back, disappointed and upset and have used food to be my comfort since then. I let myself get into that familiar rut of allowing a couple of setbacks to get me down.
I did manage to make it to deep water aerobics tonight. I guess I have to allow myself that as a victory and vow to do better tomorrow.